Beautiful days

My life has really done a turn lately... it is amazing once you remove one negative thing from the pot how quickly you can gain back your confidence and power and move forward with a snowball effect.

Since I left my last job,, the Becky, the real one that Mag you grew up with, the ballsy one with an opinion.. yeah well she back.. she a lil mad that she missed so much but she back. welll..... I'm back I should say.

I am loving my new job and my new boss, I also love that since 99% of the people there don't really know me from before,, I can start again.. "dear universe thank you for this opportunity" I can press the reset button and people I work closely with will only know what I tell them about me, this time I will do it and am doing it differently. I am sharing what needs to be shared, I am making the connections but not telling everyone everything, I made that mistake in my last job and it was silly.

I am being very careful what and who I tell stuff too, I don't know people very well there so my guards are up a bit, I like this. The people I want to let close in I will invite but otherwise nope.
I realize that I am there to be friendly to my coworkers and customers but making friends and being friendly are very different.

I have been feeling so much better about myself and knowing that I can go so much further in the last couple of days, I know it will only grow stronger, and for this I am excited.

New day new way

I am very excited, today I start my NEW job in sales! I will be learning about lighting and plumbing fixtures! I know this is not very exciting to most but for me... to learn new things everyday is wicked.

.... I have been off work for about two weeks now and I am definitely ready to get back to it. I have been cleaning and reading tons during my time off. I have been reading this great book called _ Now Find your Strengths. Its great, you read all about these interviews that these guys did with 2 million people who are excelling in their jobs, then they took this information and created common threads... 34 patterns actually. So its based on the science that when we are born we have many strengths and talents, by the time we are 3 years old, the strongest thread have been developed and those are our strength they hold strong through our lives. Actually it turns out our brains get smaller as we get older .. also when we get smarter our brains shrink too. HUH


So once you get through the first 3 chapters of the book and learn the differences between Talents, Strengths, skill and knowledge you take this online test.. it takes about 40 min and it gives you a series of A and B questions with how you respond the exam tells you your top 5 strengths, then you can go ahead and continue reading the book to see what they mean.... It has been amazing to learn why it is I do some of the things I do....
Really..

Like for example as ironic as it is that I have pretty much always been disorganized ( which has always driven me crazy but I never did organize) is the opposite of my top strength.. which is called Strategic.. its that I actually have a natural talent to take disorganization, clutter and chaos and find many ways and solutions to organize it... hence why I have (for as long as I can remember sorted my coins.. and pens.. and odd things) So for the last couple of days since I have had the time I have been using that talent to actually organize my life.. it finally feels right in my house.

There are two others, once is Achiever.. which is basically that everyday starts at 0 for me.. and throughout the day I need to achieve things in order to feel good at the end of the day. otherwise (so true) I get really disappointed and down on myself.. this is great... and there is a catch.. which is also true,, that everyday I also feel that I have only accomplished about 75% of what I feel I can do because in my mind there is always more even if I have literally filled every min of my day I will still feel there is more...

then I have INPUT... this is the fact that I collect and keep things... things that interest me.. books, coins, pens, things, knowledge.. and I keep them... Its a great thing because with learning new things and reading books is one of my things to collect so I am on a constant hunt for new knowledge.. then you put achiever in there with it and it keeps me going to find new and get new.. then you throw Strategic in there and that's where I can drive myself nuts... to organize and sort all of these THINGS I constantly collect... oi


If you have read the book I am also WOO and empathy..

I would strongly suggest reading this book and doing the test!

let me know I would be interested to find out what others are!

Sharpen the Saw, Plan ahead

So, I have been doing many things since my last post.... I am currently up North doing a little sharpening of the saw, it is very important that I do this since I will be starting my new job on the 12th, I have accepted and will be starting back in sales for a period of time. The best way to learn about something is to sell it! This is a great new opportunity for me and I am very excited. I have also been promoting my Photography, I want it to grow so I can have my pieces in the gallery spring, I need to get my planning ahead done while I am here, business plans, projections for both new opportunities the sales I want to be making over the next year in my new job as well as the projections for my photography sales... I haven't done this before but I know that what I was doing before needs to change, sooo I am making the change to organized...

Thankfull

Today I am again very grateful for the opportunities which have been brought to me! I made the choice to end some relationships and mend others and I am very thankful for how they have fallen away and fit back in, I had created a very messy situation and I am very very thankful for how it all came together.

I have learnt my lesson with this, I am changing, I will continue to change, I will continue to learn. This has been a huge lesson for me and I am going to take from these lessons and change from them.

picking up the pieces

This is my blog, I have created this to be able to write out what needs to be said.

I have created some things in my life that I am not proud of right now. I have created false beliefs in others and myself. I have created a relationship with people that I do not want to be in. I have created a lot of pain for myself and others. I am so sorry.

I want to change, I can change. I want to create meaningful relationships with people and I do not want to hurt them. Today I had to end a relationship that I have been feeding into for a while now, I have gone back and forth with it a couple of times. I ended up making some bad decisions based on a false belief and now have to deal with the consequences. I have not been fair to this person in continuing to be with them now, when I do not want to step into the reality that is later. I had to end this today and they do not understand, they do not understand because I have been feeding into it and creating.

I am sorry.

I have a huge opportunity in my life right now to make some big changes for myself and my future, It has come to head that I have to change my ways because what I have been doing does not and will not continue to work if I want what I want.

I will not cry over this, I have some friendships to fade, some to mend. I am not proud of some of the things I have done, but what I need to do is not try to wallow in my sorrows and play the victim, I need have the strength to deal with the consequences and move forward in my life, and learn from where I have been.

Lots in the works!

So!!!! In the last couple of days, maybe a week things have been stirring up in my world, the change in my life has been coming for a while and I know I was afraid of what to do next, its amazing when you work under someone if you don't know who you are for sure or know that your amazing that person that your working for can have amazing power over you, the thing I am grateful for is, once you realize they don't have that power any longer how quickly things can change and where the courage, strength and confidence comes from knowing that you can.

I have stepped into the light, I gave my two weeks notice at my job and I am done at the end of the month. I am currently still looking for a job position that is right for me, I want to work in a design firm, I want to learn different aspects of design, commercial, retail, promotion design, I am also interested in things like fabric and textiles. In the past two weeks I have met all types of people, designers, architects, furniture designers, real estate agents, I have been interested in parts of what they all do.

I am in the works of designing my way. My way to incorporate all those amazing things that excite me into what I will be doing.

I have also been promoting my photography, this is something that REALLY excited about! I want to sell my work as custom canvas sizes. I want them to hang in high end homes, and be seen all over the place, I want to use them for promotions and advertising! I have had a couple of people inquire about them and am in the works of a couple of sales!!!

I went to and event last night and re-connected with a bunch of my network and relationships in the design world. I'm not going to say much more on this but the updates are coming!!


MMMMMWAH so grateful for this experience thank you Universe!

Changing one step at a time

This past weekend has been so great, so many amazing things have been happening. Its like once I decided that I have the permission to change and do better, it came flooding in. I am so thankful for having this experience and so very excited for whats coming!

This next two weeks will be big for me, it is like the end of my year and next year starts after my birthday. I need to take action today! I will not play small for the universe, I am bigger than that! Times up, today I grow the balls and take the big step to changing my life for the better, why wait!

Will keep you posted ;)